Drops a Deuce on the Childfree

A couple of days ago the Google delivered a blog post to me from with the intriguing title Wait until this gets picked up in a childfree by choice forum.

Of course I had to read it.


Al Bundy

The post is about the author’s experience on a recent flight. Some people on the plane were asked to shuffle seats and, in the resulting melee, one of the passengers took issue with being re-seated next to a woman holding an infant. According to dooce the resulting exchange between the passenger and a flight attendant went like this:

“I need my stuff!” he yelled. “And I most certainly won’t sit next to a BABY.” He yelled this with his arm extended, his finger pointing at the child. Every person who was on board the plane could hear him.

The flight attendant tried to calm him down. “Well, you see—”

“I will NOT sit next to a BABY on an AIRPLANE,” he interrupted, his voice booming through the whole cabin.

Now, assuming this all went down as described, I’ll agree with no reservations that this is asshole-ish behavior. Even if you hate kids and have had a horrible day, you shouldn’t treat people like that. There’s likely a better way to handle the situation. What I do take issue with is the title of the article and the assumptions it makes.

Facts Not in Evidence

One can only draw the conclusion that the author assumes the belligerent man is childfree. That’s really the only way the title makes sense. However, if you read the post you’ll notice that there is no evidence – none at all – presented that would lead you to this conclusion. I’m guessing here, but if the man was wearing a badge that said “I’m Childfree and a Kid Hater” or one of these awesome t-shirts she probably would have included that information in the post. She didn’t.

So, she is inferring his childfree-ness from his behavior. In this case angrily asserting a preference for not being seated next to a potentially screaming, pooping, peeing, and/or vomiting baby while trapped in a tin can at 50,000 feet for several hours. This apparently is something that only a childfree person is capable of.


“Wait until this gets picked up in a childfree by choice forum”?

Here’s the deal – this post is a non-story without the title. If the author didn’t drag the word “childfree” into the piece it would just be a story about an asshole on a plane… an asshole that is likely to have kids of his own. After all, the childfree are only about 10% of the population. And let me tell you, as a person that flies on average about 60,000 miles a year and has done so every year for the last decade – stories about assholes on planes are a dime a dozen; they’re about as fresh as a joke about airline food

…what is the deal with airline food anyway?  <Rim Shot!>

6 Responses to Drops a Deuce on the Childfree

  1. Sven March 17, 2014 at 1:58 am #

    Haha, I think he probably has children, that’s why he wont sit next to a baby on a plane. I’ve got children and man if I can get a baby-free flight I am in heaven. Mine seldom flew as infants and if they did you can bet your bottom dollar I would plan it so they would be feeding or sleeping through it. Small spaces and stinky/noisy babies do not go well together.

  2. Madison January 27, 2014 at 10:10 pm #

    As the comments show, you folks really don’t like kids – or the parents who have them. Yet the continuation of the human race depends on bringing new human beings into the world.

    And spare me the claims about how kids are bad for the environment, when it’s doubtful you have ever not taken a tropical vacation or not bought another vehicle because it hurts the environment.

    • Lance January 27, 2014 at 10:40 pm #

      A single comment by one person does not mean “(the childfree) really don’t like kids – or the parents who have them”. A small percentage of the population choosing not to have kids is not putting the future of the human race at risk. And to paraphrase you, spare me the claims about how burning tires in my driveway is bad for the environment, when it’s doubtful you have ever not taken a tropical vacation or not bought another vehicle because it hurts the environment. In other words some of us choose not having children as a way to moderate our footprint just like you (probably?) choose not to burn stacks of tires. And, BTW, feel free to completely disregard the substance of the post. That is an author, with a massive audience, who writes a story in which she claims the jerk must be childfree. With no evidence.

    • Misha May 31, 2016 at 3:50 pm #

      Pardon me, as a childfree adult I personally am not fond of children, from the messes they make to the sounds and smells. That being said I am in a minority, my partner adores children, he just doesn’t want children of his own. What I have found is more often than not childfree people take no issue with children, often we like them; what we tend to take issue with are the parents’ parenting styles (please see the other rants on this blog) parents that do not consider how others around them are disturbed by wailing babies in hotels, etc. or the fact that parents are often criticizing our life choices, mental health and femininity because we aren’t taking the same life path.

  3. Bob Thorn November 2, 2013 at 4:47 pm #

    Babies are stupid, ugly and obnoxious. With parenting skills circling the drain in society, the parent of that possibly screaming poop machine probably would have done little to keep it’s ugly trap shut. Childfree flights, were art thou?

  4. Chibi Jeebs October 26, 2013 at 6:48 pm #

    Ah, linkbaiting. Sad to see the almighty Dooce has had to drop to such deplorable measures just to be relevant and get page views.

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